Love is war.
And in Welvin, Massachusetts, it's being broadcast directly to your phone.
When a "public safety" system called W.E.L.V.E. starts sending relationship-ending push alerts to every device in town, Frank Peniston - vigilante, gadget tinkerer, and Ghost Guzzle enthusiast - finds himself caught between an AI-driven heartbreak conspiracy and his growing feelings for deli-counter heartthrob Candyne Hartt.
The source? Heartstream Solutions, a rebranded roller rink that's now ground zero for romance weaponization - complete with rose-shaped drones, subliminal audio hypnosis, and a mandatory-love dress code. With Ronald under the influence of a phantom ex-wife and Bluetooth itself turned against him, Frank goes undercover as a sleazy speed-dating coach to infiltrate the heart of the operation.
What follows is a high-voltage battle of wits, wires, and questionable rooftop intimacy - culminating in one last ride in Madge, Frank's beloved 2005 Chevy Malibu... a ride that ends in fire.
From Frankfort Petersén's unhinged mind comes Book 9 of the Frank Peniston Mysteries - a satirical, action-packed noir-romance parody where love letters are malware, gadgets are improvised from baby monitors, and the truth is always too poetic for its own good.
